It must be especially hard to be disliked by someone you love and not know what to do next.
Should you adjust yourself to minimize their resentment or just ignore the negativity?
Is it an unhealthy way of reacting when faced with dislike and always wanting to strike back at the other person inside?
Should you change yourself to please the other person, or simply ignore the dislikes?
Isn't there something wrong with the impulse to subconsciously want to dislike someone when dislike strikes?
Hi friend! 🌼 Sending you a little flower to relax first~
"I don't know what to do when I'm disliked by someone I like" 😰 I can understand this kind of anxiety and nagging. After all, it's easy to get caught up in self-doubt when someone we care about shows dislike.
Here we have to distinguish two key points:
What you call "being disliked", is it your [subjective feeling], or is it an [objective fact] that the other person has clearly expressed.
[Subjective feeling] is a conclusion you come to based on the actual situation plus your personal interpretation, which may be different for everyone.
[Objective facts] are things that really happened, and no matter who looks at them, the results are the same and do not vary from person to person.
For example: let's say it's raining outside ☔. Some people find the rain comfortable, others find it annoying.
"The fact that it's raining is a fact in and of itself, and it's not going to change.
But whether you find it "good" or "annoying" is a matter of personal opinion, right?
So, let's figure out "what's going on" before we decide "what to do".
If you're saying that you're being disliked is just your "subjective feeling" based on what the other person says or does, then you may need to adjust your mindset a little bit.
Are you oversensitive because you care too much about the other person? The other person may be unintentionally an expression or a sentence, you interpreted as dislike, which is easy to cause misunderstanding, as often said "overthinking".
The best thing to do in this situation is to communicate directly and get the misunderstanding out of the way so that everyone can relax.
● If what you say [is disliked] is an objective fact that the other person is telling you clearly, then it's time to [make a choice based on your goals].
If you really can't let go, even if you are disliked, you want to get back, then take the road of "change yourself", to adapt to the needs of the other party. But this may be quite tired, just like "love and kill each other", until both sides are tired, perhaps let go.
If you can't accept this obvious dislike, then let go. Don't be like "holding on to a ball of fire even though you know it's hot", be kind to yourself.
The key is still how you differentiate and choose.
The world and I are rooting for you! Remember to love yourself a little bit more 💯
